Y'all are seriously going to have to kiss my ass for this one. Seriously. Made from scratch, ladies and gents, please welcome:
Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say 'ni' at will to old ladies. There is a pestilence upon this land. Nothing is sacred. Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress at this period in history.
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Much of MADNESS, and more of SIN, and HORROR the soul of the plot.
That's false advertising! Clearly the smiley pianist is naked as the day he was born. If he's you, then you should throw those shorts off in a display of solidarity.