ChuckF, Esq.

[ChuckF]

Yeah I know there's a member news thread, what about it?

Got a letter in the mail today, explaining how I passed that bar exam thing I was talking about.

So that happened.

[ceptimus]

You should have turnips to celebrate.

[Waluigi]

Just what the world needs... another lawyer.

[chunksmediocrites]

Congratulations!

[LadyShea]

So you can officially use Esquire now? Very nice, Doctor

[Crumb]

Congrats!

[Sock Puppet]

Excellent. My plan is all coming together now.

Um, I mean, congrats and shit.

[Stephen Maturin]

I am very sorry, Chuck. If there's anything lisarea and I can do during this troubled time, just say the word.

[Clutch Munny]

You have done admiralty, Esq.!

[ChuckF]

Originally Posted by LadyShea

So you can officially use Esquire now? Very nice, Doctor

I think so, I am waiting on written permission from HM The Queen. I still have to get my paper license and to be sworn in by a judge. That will happen within the next couple of weeks.

[Stephen Maturin]

Originally Posted by LadyShea

Very nice, Doctor

Oh shit, that reminds me! There was this guy who graduated law school and passed the bar a few years ahead of me. He'd show up at the law school sometimes to do legal research, and I'd run into him at the designated nicotine junkie area near the door to the library.

Dude would regale us with stories about the practice of law. Except for him, the be-all and end-all of practicing law was convincing other people how totally proper it was for someone with a J.D. to call himself "Doctor" and insist that others do likewise. In fact, for him it was not just proper but a kind of moral imperative.

One day he told us about how he called himself "The Law Doctor" and had actually set up his own bar association -- The Law Doctor Bar Association -- to compete with real bar association. [Many years later, I loled about all this when reading how Rand Paul had set up his own ophthalmology certifying board and certified himself so he could call himself board certified.] He even talked about how he advertised in the phone book.

Upon getting home, I went immediately to the Yellow Pages and found the dude's ad. It was big. Really big. About half a page. It must have cost him a sizeable chunk of change.

Anyhoo, the ad's dominant feature was a photo of some guy in a white coat, surgical mask and surgical hat hold up his hands, which were sheathed in rubber gloves. It was creepy as fuck, kinda reminiscent of the doctor from Hellraiser 2.

The text was completely insane. He went on and on about the legitimacy of calling lawyers "Doctor," eventually devolving into a screed about how the real bar association was all about squelching truth and freedom of speech.

The Toledo Bar Association brought the ad to the attention of the Ohio Supreme Court's attorney regulatory division.

And the Law Doctor faded into memory.

[BrotherMan]

Now is the time. Today is the day. Society is ready for it finally at long last. They can have their dreamy cake and eat it too.

Call your local television station and pitch them the idea of gay divorce court. Or whatever television court genre you want as long as it's gay. (You can be gay married in that Carolina you're in right? No? Okay, then there's another step you need to take: Move to a state where you can be gay married.) You as the Big Gay Judge don't have to be... you know... that's the bailiff's job. He can be overladen with catch phrases, you know the ones. "Oh no you din't!" "Girl, you better talk to the hand cuz the judge won't hear it!"

Just think of it, man! You'll be so flush with cash that the won't care that some deadbeat owes us 200 Euro.

[Stephen Maturin]

Originally Posted by BrotherMan

You'll be so flush with cash that the won't care that some deadbeat owes us 200 Euro.

Ain't that much money in the entire universe.

[ChuckF]

GAY PET DIVORCE COURT

[Demimonde]

[curses]

I swear Demi's been sitting on that image just waiting for a thread like this. Congrats, Chuck. Can we be "student loans that cost more than we earn in a month" buddies?

[livius drusus]

And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the third beast say, "Come and see." And I beheld, and lo a black horse; and he that sat on him had a pair of balances in his hand. And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say, "A measure of wheat for a penny, and three measures of barley for a penny; and see thou hurt not the oil and the wine."

[Sock Puppet]

I would totally change my user title to "Color my underpants important," but obviously I can't since I'm not an Esquire.

[curses]

Yabbut if you spell color as "colour" then you can make yourself look even more pretentious, so there's that.

[Stephen Maturin]

Originally Posted by curses

Yabbut if you spell color as "colour" then you can make yourself look even more pretentious, so there's that.

[ChuckF]

I would like to make a joke implying that the "colo[u]r" associated with importance is the same colo[u]r associated with f[a]eces, and thereby impute some measure of f[a]ecal incontinence or sha[e]rt proclivity to Stephen Maturin. But I'm not quite sure how to do that in an appropriately elegant way.

[SR71]

Originally Posted by ceptimus

You should have turnips to celebrate.

And beets!


Good going big guy! Congratulations!

[maddog]

By gum that was fast! In my state we don't usually get notified till Thanksgiving or so.

Congratulations! Chuck's in the club!

#2865

[ChuckF]

We apparently have the fastest turnaround time in the country; makes up a little bit for the crappy administration, I guess. I have a couple of friends in your state who have to wait until November, and they are pretty jealous.

[Megatron]

Well, congrats motherfucker